What advice would you give to the parents of a rebellious teenager?

tough love! Be a parent first and then a friend. She will probably hate you as my son does/did it is getting better but he is 20.





Good Luck!What advice would you give to the parents of a rebellious teenager?
Spank the child or keep her grounded.What advice would you give to the parents of a rebellious teenager?
Depends what you mean by rebellious...





ALL teenagers need to rebel to grow up and assert themselves or express themselves and start to date etc. Helps them assert themselves when grown up.





But diff between that and being a gang member etc.





What were you like when you were a kid?





Maybe help the kid grow up, find a boy or girlfriend (then watch room become spotless)
Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child.
pick your battles. have proof before you accuse them of things.





my mom used to accuse me of being a bad kid, and doing drugs, but i never did. if she would have taken the time to find out...she would have seen that even though i came home late, and snuck out i was not up to bad things, or doing drugs, just haning out with my friends. but set boudries too!
Please define your problem....everyone has a different definition of rebellious. there are many stratagies that you can use, but there is a different one for every problem.
Hang in there. Depending on how rebellious your teen is, you may want to speak with a school counselor about options. Good luck.
Consider a family swap...here is an example: Find out if the teen's English teacher likes this book and help with an extra credit paper on this idea - Harper Lee's characters Mayella and Scout can SWAP FAMILIES for 40 days in a 2007 version of To Kill A Mockingbird? This a great movie idea!? Maybe for YouTube? The teen may then think you are so darn cool!!!
need to try to communicate more , but remember you are the parent.
You need to crack down on them. Tough love. Don't give an inch. They need to know that you love them, but they also need to realize that their behavior is not acceptable. If they are really unruly take EVERYTHING out of their room except their bed and dresser, no TV, DVD player, computer. Make them earn their things back with good behavior. A friend of mine did this to her son and he is now 25, a college graduate, married with 2 kids.
Parents and teens need to be able to communicate, first of all. It is 'normal' for some rebellion to go on in a teens life. It's part of growing up and seeking a level of independance however, I have found from my own personal experience that when I talked with my daughter on all levels - not just when she did something wrong; when she knew and understood what my expectations were, we were always able to talk about issues. When she wanted to stay up later at night (past 9:00), we talked about it. We discussed the pros and cons and I allowed her to prove to me that she would continue to be responsible, get up and attend school and not sleep in class, etc. As she proved to me that she was able to accept the responsibility of some of the issues, I was able to agree. Again, as a parent, you MUST keep the lines of communication open between you and your child. You don't have to be ';their friend';, but you need to be firm, yet loving and allow them the room they need to grow with as less stress as possible. When you can talk about it and reach conclusions - everybody can sleep better at night. I didn't have to 'hoop and holler' in my house. We wrote each other notes and letters and gave each other cards. We hugged a lot and talked a lot, did lots of things together. I was able to 'see' how my child was maturing and who her friends were and because we could communicate, I could tell her I was concerned about this friend or that one and she was mature enough to keep her eyes open and make wise choices. Talk. Keep talking. Spend time together, Be silly together. Do what you have to do to let your child know that you love them, understand and will help them through these times.


If all else fails -and the issues are more traumatic, make sure you involve your child with a counselor or outside agent (and you) to help you both 'see' and 'mend' so that your family structure can stay intact. If the child continues to rebell (not come home, break rules, etc.) there could be more involved (alcohol, drugs, associates who are leading them).
Tough Love!!! Your teenager may HATE you NOW, but let me assure you..... when they become adults; they will REALLY APPRECIATE the BOUNDARIES you have set for them. Also, when they have children of their own; they WILL KNOW how to set boundaries themselves!!
Firstly do reflect on yourself as a parent as to why your teenager is rebellious. They are a rebel due to many reasons. Maybe he/she needs some room and space from the parents, maybe due to school or friends. Try to talk and listen to the explanation. Be a friend. Give them realistic reasons as to why they can't do certain things at this age rather than to just to say things like ';because you live under my roof you have to do as I say so';. Be firm but also be consistent in your reasonings and have realistic expectations on them. I hope this will help.
I was a rebelious teenager but know i'm married with 2 kids of myu own. I hope to god that my kids don't do what I did. My mother passed away when I was 11 and my dad did a great job to raise us but he wasn't exactly involved in our social life. I pretty much did whatever I wanted. If he craked down more I mighthave stayed home more. I even used to steel his truck at night while he was sleeping but he caught me and put his keys under his pillow at night. I think you really need to crack down on your teen cause I could have gotten in alot more trouble than I did for the things that I did (smoking, drinking,hanging out with the bad croud and stangers-who knows what they could have done to me)


Your kids will understand later in life that your hard punishments where meant to protect them.


Best of luck to you!
Define rebellious!





I was an A+ student, I did all my homework and had good friends. I went out very rarely and when I did I went to a friends house and stayed there, never wandering the streets or causing trouble.





I came home a few days 5 mins late! And the next thing you know my mom's all in my face about how rebellious I was being! She grounded me, called my grandmother, told my friends moms... it was horrid. Her and I argued a lot because of stuff like this. She told my aunt i was having sex (at 16) and I didn't lose my virginity until i was 18.





Today I'm 26, married, have a good job, own a home, have a beautiful son and expecing baby boy #2 (36w 4d pregnant) and I still have to deal with the stigma my mom put on me about being a bad kid.





Anyway, long story short I think some parent's perception of rebel is completely different then others.
Do a home boot camp....its sounds drastic but it works. Its not easy but you will see results. Show him he can rebel all you like but that ultimately YOU are in control and if he wants you can control everything he does right down to the smallest things like using the toilet and speaking freely.


Do it and you WILL reep the benefits. Having done it on my cheeky theif of a 12yr old two yrs ago i have never looked back since. It will force him into getting some manners and respecting you. Good Luck
This, too, shall pass.
It's usually a phase and they will grow out of it. But taking away privileges is a huge way of knocking the kid down a notch or two. Make them earn the cash to pay for the cell phone, computer and clothes. Most rebels have expensive tastes in clothes and hair care products, and making them earn the money will put that attitude in check. Keeping them busy and knowing WHAT they are up to is key; if they're mopping the floors and raking leaves you know exactly where they are and what they're doing.
never spoil them,dont give them what they want if they didnt earn it either with good grades or good behavior,dont give them anything u cant afford just to make them happy,they wont appreciate it